I took a break from reading Dave's biography. There were three reasons for my vacation:
- My self-perception felt so entangled with my idyllic idea of him that to see his character revealed felt like a personal insult.
- I was in need of a vacation, anyways, from this Wallace stuff. Distance lends perception.
- I had to begin reading The Iliad for Reed. This book, and Gilgamesh, which I haven't yet started.
Today I started back up reading the biography. (Every Love Story is a Ghost Story), by the way. I spent about 3 hours at a coffee shop reading—broken occasionally by a thought, or watching the harsh Charlevoix rain downtown, or writing something down.
That's where I've been: Charlevoix, Michigan. I'm staying for another week—which means I will have stayed here for a total of 4 weeks. I'm a part-time gardener; I work on a farm mowing, using a weed-whacker, shoveling, painting, mulching . . . I've also spent time weeding a tourist-attraction-slash-wedding-facility "Castle Farms".
Mostly, though, I've been waking up early, working outdoors for 5 hours, reading, walking downtown, and getting roped into interesting scenarios. Oh yeah, I also am driving a 1990's "Powder Blue" (Mom's description) Cadillac, previously owned by great grandma Rosemary: an allegedly formidable woman whom I had only met once. I go to the library often. I've made voyages to the 30-minute close-by city of Petosky, Michigan. I have written postcards to dear friends. It is lonely here, but I love it.
I've been afraid to post anything for a while. College looms pretty large in the near-future, and the main objective recently has been distracting myself. Normally, I would fall back on entertainment. So I fell back on entertainment. That being said, I've made some significant progress on furthering my understanding of a few ideas, the main two being
- Authenticity w/in art (key item: Bo Burnham's new movie Eighth Grade)
- Consciousness (key item: Gödel, Escher, Bach by Douglass R. Hofstadter)
As this is an update blog, I won't be diving headfirst into those topics in this post. Lookout for later posts on these topics.
I'm back in Atlanta. For a while, I thought about driving down to Albany, GA, where a lot of my childhood memories lay dormant in wait of rediscovery. Instead, I chose to stay here and reach out to friends. It's the eye of the storm, before I fly up to college, so I don't want to stretch my time too thin.
I've been running, and I'm looking into chess. By the way, I finished the biography. It was really, really good—and I feel really as though I know the direction that his work was trying to go, and have had many, many things cleared up. I feel pretty separated from the idea of him, having seen a large section of his entire self.
I'm glad that I took a break from publishing these posts—hopefully the publishing of this one will spur me to publish more soon.